Message from Shoi...

Hi

Welcome new subscribers and regulars. Good to have you join us here today. It's been a brisk past week, and an exciting one too as we bring you our first featured expert, and talking to designers which I hope to showcase before you. As for today...

Inner Child... The Final Segment

Today, Ray will present the conclusion to "Inner Child". He'll also be tying up and summarizing all the concepts he's introduced in his earlier articles under the topic "CLARITY" (Part 1 of our "The Coming Alive of Internet Marketing" series) -- Be sure to catch the final segment of Ray's "Inner Child"

If you like what Ray is saying and you think it may help somebody, do forward this issue to as many of your friends as possible.

Next week, our series continues with an article by our Featured Expert -- More info below

Do you have an area of expertise to share in "The Coming Alive of Internet Marketing" series? We welcome your participation so do drop Ray an email.

Shoi's Pick

I've been talking to many creative folk these past 2-3 weeks, and many have said they've been disappointed with the way they've been marketed on the www.

I've always loved jewelry, fashion and art, so starting a column where I can share with you creative work that lights a fire within me is something close to my heart. I used to design jewelry myself before starting eMasters. I just don't have the time to do it anymore, so I'm going to do the next best thing ie. promote them. I thought about this and I think that promotion in an uncluttered and focused environment will do more to get them noticed. And, that's the setting we have in in-the-loop.

I would love to be able to work with designers and artists and I hope the interaction will challenge me to stretch my own stale creative boundaries... and take more risks! Hope you like what I'm doing here so far.

For today... I'd like you to meet a designer who's so passionate about her craft that she's mastered 50 chainmaille weave techniques! You'll also get to feast your eyes on her exquisite maille jewelry -- Meet Rebeca Mojica in Shoi's Pick


Enjoy today's read... See you again next week. Blessed be.

Editor

in-the-loop™ Ezine

Email Shoi

The Coming Alive of Internet Marketing - The Series

Coming Up Next Week...

Adam J. Kovitz, CEO and Editor-in-Chief of The National NetWorker will be joining us next week.

To say that NetWorking has always come easy for Adam is something of an understatement. Adam has personally been responsible for billions of dollars worth of referrals to business associates.

As our Featured Expert in March 19th's issue of in-the-loop, Adam will be sharing his valuable experience and insights on strategic partnerships and networking.

Do visit his site and sign up for his newsletter -- This week's article by Adam called "Jumping the Networking Shark" is an eye-opener.

---

Today's Feature...

Inner Child - II

© 2007 Raymond Siew

Tenacity without direction is of no use. Tenacity directed towards the truth is courage. The ability to face truth with courage builds character. Character leads to the silent confidence of knowing and control. And that is power.

The above is something I coined up to help focus myself, my son, Mark, in his chess competitions, and is dedicated to Shoi who enCOURAGEd me to speak my truth.

I left you with a question last week: What is reality? -- There was a time we thought we knew what it meant. Then we discovered quantum physics (and the WWW?) and the rules changed. In fact, we're not even sure what the rules are anymore. The new science, quantum physics, postulates that information can travel faster than light eg. If we were to attempt to measure one aspect of a particle on one end of the universe, it will change a measureable quantity of a particle, from the same source, on the other side, instantaneously. And among other revelations with deep implications to our understanding of reality, it turned conventional science on its head.

But does that mean we now abandon the search for reality to scientists? I think not, if you accept this re-framing of the implications. If we can think of reality as God's imagination, then quantum physics or the WWW didn't come by accident... maybe it's God's way of telling us that we don't have it all figured out yet. He has revealed his reality and is challenging us to follow him, to understand him and to become one with him again----"And the truth shall set you free"----and I believe he has already given us the tools to see his reality all around us.

Allow me to call the inner child by another name. Can we call him the holy spirit, God in us, God is us?

*Note: The use of the masculine pronoun in this series is not meant to be gender specific.

Let me also postulate why I think it requires a process to reach this child. Last week, I said there seems to be a reason why children get "mixed up" despite the best efforts of parents. The "7 Deadly Sins"? Let's just take one. Sloth. Do you think that could be hard-wired in us in some way? Is that why it requires effort to instill good work ethics in children? Let's take another. Anger. Could it also be hard-wired in us? Is that why it takes so much discipline to be patient?

Is not character formed when we overcome say, sloth/anger/greed? What do you really see when you look at two people, and say, "that guy looks confident and the other guy looks beaten down"? Could we be saying that one of them has overcome? Is that why we are given choices in life, and every choice we make decides who we are? And to make the right choice do we not need to turn our tenacity towards our truth and reality----the REAL issues (realities) of business on the web, for instance----and overcome them? Without overcoming, without confidence from overcoming, aren't we more susceptible to the next "opportunity"?

And here is the paradox: Are we also not hard-wired to be productive, to want good to triumph, to feel bad when we lie to ourselves or anyone else? Could this be God's voice? And is this voice trumped?

Can we hear when the child is having a tantrum, throwing up illusions? We hear him sometimes in the aftermath... after all the mayhem, after the tantrum is spent. And we say " God, what have I done". And then often, we continue to hurt that child by creating more illusions to hide from what we have done.

Note: I argue there is ONE inner child because this returns the responsibility to us and not the mysterious "other voice" -- If so, then "growing up" also means learning to listen to the quietened child consistently... and when we listen we discover our truth.

OK. Let's try to tie everything together -- I said there is one child. I said despite what we do as parents, the child still seems to end up with issues. I am saying our job in life is to figure out our truth and reality (God's imagination). I also said that scientific thinking isn't all it's cut out to be. And, I said all we want is a successful business -- What a mess. Bear with me.

Before I try to tie it all up, there is one other thing: Let's agree on a definition for "complex" and "complicated" -- To me, science is complex, the internet is complex... but business is complicated, people are complicated -- Let me try to explain why.

I said there is one inner child within us and this child is both all-knowing and a master illusionist. If the child feels unsafe or threatened or angry, he can throw up his defences (mental constructs, rationalisation, denial, etc). Even if a dangerous situation is imagined, then our emotions respond with the appropriate feelings. Now, the question is: Is the situation real? -- Have you ever seen someone responding inappropriately to a situation? Could that response possibly be triggered by some past issues?

We can have a working summary like this...

There are fears which come from our imagination, past hurts, etc, (which have nothing to do with the reality of the moment) and I've argued that these are caused by an angry, frightened inner child. And then there are the more "REAL" fears of moving into new challenges, like business on the WWW. If we can't separate imagined fears from "real" ones, then we will always be emotionally tripping and off-balanced -- (An excellent book to read is "Emotional Intelligence" by Daniel Goleman. Neale Donald Walsh in his book "Conversations with God" has some amazing insights into what I just called real fears. Do read his work.) -- I believe it's the job of the adult to help the child differentiate one from the other, but it's not so easy. Let us see why.

Let's look at scientific reasoning -- Science is based on assumptions, and logic is the science of reasoning based on those assumptions. Science can help us solve complex problems, but it can't really help us in a complicated world because as adults, with our baggage, we already see through many filters. And we have built our many views on our assumptions of the world. So, if the child perceives a hostile world (an assumption), he prepares the appropriate response. Sometimes even in safe situations. And, he uses scientific study to back him up.

So how can we know? How can we function in a complicated world? I think the answer may lie with the inner child -- If we can persuade the child, teach the child to check his previous and current assumptions, tell the adult to direct his tenacity towards truth and reality... then this child may start to feel safer and stop throwing up illusions with its accompanying paralysing emotions and consequences. The adult and child can now begin to see himself clearly and have a range of appropriate responses to the world. And when you have overcome, then maybe a quiet confidence can return and this child can now shower his blessing of knowing unto you. Wouldn't that be CLARITY? When the delusions stop. When you respond appropriately.

Let me digress a little. I shudder a little each time I hear someone say they are following their gut instinct and I sense much fear in them.

And that's not all. If you pursue YOUR truth and reality with all your tenacity, you'll begin to see with greater clarity as the inner child is being quietened... although others around you may not, and continue with THEIR versions of the tantrum and THEIR take on reality. You'll begin to learn to separate the issues for what they really are and navigate around the complications, as well as use scientific reasoning but this time based on more correct assumptions. Some have described this as finding the tao. That's what I meant when I said scientific reasoning isn't all it's cut out to be. The cart came before the horse. Scientific reasoning in the hands of an angry, frightened child is not a tool but a dangerous weapon.

I sometimes wonder, if this could also be what the bible meant when it said that you can only "enter the kingdom of heaven" as a child. And, if heaven is abundance, would we be showered in blessings? If that is so, then how and when will this happen?

I believe in God but I don't think he did it all in 7 days. I believe the evidence shows that he used evolution as a process to create. I believe we are God and have God in us. He speaks in a still small voice but his voice gets drowned in all that inner child tantrums. I believe when we calm that angry, frightened child, we'll hear him and know that there is NO secret. The answer has always been there. We have to overcome and be confident. And with confidence comes judgement and clarity.

But this takes a journey. I don't think we can jump the steps. We can speed it up if we are creative. We can, for instance, wisely choose whom to trust, etc.

So, I suppose you can call me a spiritual realist. You can't affirm or "positive think" yourself to success. You need it, but it's not enough. And you know that already.

This is the reality of the WWW -- With the speed of information, you can create like never before. I also believe that spirituality should have a context and a place of application... and that is in the business world, and that spirituality can show us what success really is (although I am not so sure if we should make a business out of spirituality). And if spirituality succeeds in business, then maybe we can create a better world because I don't think we have proven it's a "dog eat dog" world. I think there is still much good in the world, but we can't see it because we continue to hurt ourselves. I think we are programmed to want good, but we just have too many fears. Whom can we trust? I think the other wants to be safe, to trust, just as much as you do.

In business there are strategic partners and networking to fill the gaps of knowledge. You are not alone, you don't have to do it alone, but you need to do your part.

I hope I have argued my case well. CLARITY can return when we stop falling for the illusions... stop wanting the illusions... when we are not tripping over our fears and wants... when we stop resisting change and surrender gracefully to reality (God's imagination and your truth)... and when we stop wanting and believing in "quick fixes" -- Neale Donald Walsh said in his book that we do not need to suffer in life and I agree -- My interpretation is that will happen when we have finally learned to surrender to our truth and reality without resistance. I still find that hard but I'm getting better day by day.

The realities of business are that there are NO short cuts -- You have to pay the price, develop your skills and learn to navigate in uncertainties (maybe more so on the WWW than anywhere else).


Next week, I will like to hand over this column to our featured expert, Adam J. Kovitz of The National NetWorker -- www.TheNationalNetWorker.com -- Adam will be writing on how to find the right strategic partners and networking. I believe all new and old netpreneurs will need this to navigate the realities of business.

In memory of M. Scott Peck (May 22 1936 - Sep 25 2005), author of "The Road Less Travelled", who has my deepest gratitude for starting me on the road...

Raymond

Email your feedback to Raymond

About the author: Raymond Siew is the Business Development Strategist at eMasters. He has 21 years of corporate experience in deal-making, negotiations & business strategy and now shares his personal insights and knowledge. Raymond is also the author of the work "The Sentic Negotiator", a book that he is still writing and hopes to publish soon. The word "sentic" comes from "sentient" and denotes "awareness". In his book, Raymond demonstrates that self-awareness is the cornerstone of any successful negotiation. NB: This article DOES NOT come with reprint rights. It can only be distributed, reproduced or published in any ezines/websites in its entirety and with the author's resource box intact.

The Coming Alive of Internet Marketing TABLE OF CONTENT Introduction - The Nature of the WWW and How It Works Part 1 - Clarity Clarity by Raymond Siew Inner Child (I) by Raymond Siew Inner Child (II) by Raymond Siew Of Islands, Networking and Partnering by Adam J. Kovitz Part 2 - Due Diligence and the Question of Accountability Part 3 - Web-Based Multí-Level Markéting/Affiliate Programs and Its Business Model Part 4 - The Aftermath Created by Multí-Level Markéting & Affiliate Programs Part 5 - Summary and What is the Way Forward for Netpreneurs on the WWW?

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